


Kageyama may or may not be murdered

by haikyucomforts



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Character Death, IM ALSO BETTER AT DIALOGUE PLEASE BELIEVE ME, M/M, Marriage, Not a murder, THIS FIC IS A JOKE IM A BETTER WRITER I SWEAR, but it’s almost a murder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:07:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29932497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haikyucomforts/pseuds/haikyucomforts
Summary: in which kageyama is at home. and he is set up for a murder but like he isn’t
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 12
Kudos: 22





	Kageyama may or may not be murdered

**Author's Note:**

> i beg you to read the notes at the end

Kageyama woke up with a start as his alarm went off, ringing annoyingly loud in his ear. He scowled, reaching his hand under his pillow to snatch his phone and press the off button. 

Running his fingers through his hair, Kageyama sat up with a brief stretch and stood up from his bed, yawning as he stomped into the kitchen. 

He didn’t know why he was awake so earlier, when the moon was still high in the sky with the scattered stars glimmering. Sure, he’d wanted to get back on track with his sleep schedule, but that didn’t mean he should wake up this early.

Kageyama grumbled and grabbed a bowl from the cupboard, heading to the pantry after setting the bowl on the counter and grabbing a box of some type of cereal that he had no memory buying. 

After pouring it into the bowl he’d previously gotten, he walked bleary eyed to the fridge, his eyes had yet to adjust to the darkness.

Maybe if Kageyama had paid more attention he would’ve heard the door crack open in the hallway. Maybe if he’d waited a bit longer to wake up he would’ve noticed the light footsteps behind him, creeping up ever so slowly. Maybe, maybe if he’d been the slightest bit more aware of his surroundings, he would’ve noticed the creaking floorboards get louder and louder. 

Maybe if it wasn’t so dark, he wouldn’t have ended up in that situation.

Kageyama picked the milk up and out of the fridge, unscrewing the top. Before he could fully turn around, he saw a black figure running towards him.

Kageyama let out a high pitched scream as the figure ran into him, knocking him over. Something jabbed into his chest. The figure screamed as well, and Kageyama felt a liquid from under him.

The obvious answer here was that he had been stabbed with something, that he was currently bleeding out onto the kitchen floor.

With multiple groans of pain and slight choking noises, Kageyama slithered his hand up the wall until he felt the cold plastic of the light switch, struggling with the heavy figure still on top of him who seemed to be cackling in an evilish manner.

Kageyama flipped the light on, he at least wanted to see how bad his wound was. He looked down only to see a familiar boy.

”Omg Shouyou” He said.

”Omg Tobio” He said.

”Omg Shouyou why are you in my house” He also said.

“Tobio what do you mean I live here with you”

”What no you don’t”

”Yes I do I was in the same bed as you”

”What then why did you just try to kill me” He said as well.

”I didn’t try to kill you” He responded.

”No yes you did idiot i’m bleeding out. Omg wait Shouyou I am bleeding out I’m going to die we need to go to the hospital” He said, panicking.

”You are not bleeding out”

”Yes I am”

”No you aren’t that is milk. You spilt the milk Tobio. You spilt the milk” 

Kageyama suddenly realized that his blood felt really cold. He looked down at the liquid.

”Omg you’re right it is milk”

”Yes it is milk that is what I said”

”Hahahahahahagahahga cool do you want to get married” He asked, looking immensely cool.

”Omg really?????” He said, eyes wide.

”Ahahahaha yes really and you should say yes because I’m cool” He said.

”Omg yes Tobio I will marry you”

”Omg really”

”Omg yes”

And then they both got married and lived happily ever after, adopting two cats that they named Blue and Fairy then they both died a gruesome, slow, painful death after driving the to a restaurant for their honeymoon but then they got in a terrible crash leaving the both of them mangled.

**Author's Note:**

> YOU GUYS HAVE TO BELIEVE ME THIS WHOLE THING IS A JOKE IM A WAY BETTER WRITER THAN THIS


End file.
